Saturday, December 13, 2003

NETPICK
Matter of concern

A lawyer's wife dies. At the cemetery, people are appalled to see that the tombstone reads: "Here lies Shirley, wife of Sam Johnson, LLD, Wills, Divorce, Malpractice, and Immigration Legal Services"

Suddenly, Sam bursts into tears. His brother says, "You shouldn't cry, pulling a cheap stunt like this on Shirley's tombstone!"

Through his tears, Sam sobs, "You don't understand! They left out my phone number".

Kathryn's 5-year-old developed a strong interest in spelling once she learned to spell ‘stop’. After that, she tried to figure out her own words. From the back seat of the car she'd yell, "Mom, what does f-g-r-p-l spell?"

"Nothing," Kathryn said.

Sitting at breakfast she'd suddenly ask, "Mom, what does d-o-e-b spell?"

"Nothing," Kathryn answered.

This went on for several weeks. Then one afternoon as they sat colouring in her room, she asked, "Mom, what does l-m-d-z spell?"

Kathryn smiled at her and said, "Nothing, sweetheart."

The 5-year-old carefully set down her crayon, sighed and said, "Boy, there sure are a lot of ways to spell ‘nothing’!"

The boss was very exasperated with his new secretary. She ignored the telephone when it rang.

"You must answer the telephone," he told her irritably.

"All right," she replied, "but it seems so silly. Nine times out of ten, it's for you!"

(Culled from the Net by Sunil Sharma)