ULTA-PULTA
Lie ‘undetector’ test!
Jaspal Bhatti

"WHAT is a lie detector?" asked my son. I told him it was an instrument to determine whether a person was telling the truth or not. He said, "That means it is a very useful instrument to determine the truth in a politician’s statement," I told him that there was a warning written on the rear plate of the instrument — "Do not try on politicians. The instrument might get damaged!"

My son knew I was lying because no such instructions was given on the instrument. But just to maintain the dignity of the father-son relationship, he pretended to respect my knowledge.

My son again asked how did the investigating agencies decide on whom to perform such high-tech tests like P-300 or narcoanalises. I again explained that ordinary criminals were not required to undergo such tests this was because ordinary criminals start uttering the truth as soon they were subjected to second or third degree methods of investigation. Policemen find these torturous methods more effective than any scientific methods.

He again enquired, "Dad do you think officers like the ex-police Commissioner of Mumbai, R.S. Sharma will be put to the same second or third degree methods to extract the truth?" I replied, what are you talking son? They will never ill-treat their fellow brothers after retirement". My son soon saw my point of view. After all, every policeman has to retire one day.

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