WEBSIDE HUMOUR
Dream big

Wife: I dreamed you gave me $500 for summer clothes last night. You would not spoil that dream, would you, dear?

Husband: "Of course not, darling. You may keep the $500."

A squirrel was sitting in an apple tree when all of a sudden a cow came climbing up the tree. Surprised to see a climbing cow, the squirrel asked the newcomer, "What in hell are you doing here". The cow’s answer was, "I thought I’d eat some oranges." So the squirrel told him, "But this is an apple tree". And to that the cow answered, "I know. I brought my own".

A passenger called to make reservations on a small charter plane that departs from Teterboro airport in New Jersey. The clerk said, "The plane is full with baggage and passengers." Then she asked, "How much do you weigh, sir?" Not thinking clearly, he answered, "With or without clothes?" "Well," said the clerk, "how do you intend to travel?"

The physician after examination, wrote a tranquiliser on the prescription slip for his hypertensive cardiac patient. The patient’s wife asks, "Doctor, when are these medicines to be given?" Doctor: "These are to be taken by you. He needs rest".

Tim goes to his boss’s office and says, "Sir, I need tomorrow off. My wife is going to have a baby." The boss gives him the day off.

Two days later, Tim walks into work, and the boss asks, "Was it a boy or a girl?" Tim says, "We won’t know for nine months."

Compiled by Sunil Sharma