Feasts to remember
One need not have oodles of money to splurge on food at a wedding. Instead, a dash of creativity and out-of-the-box planning can help you shun caterers and offer a mouth-watering fare to your guests, writes Pushpesh Pant

A bidai at a Pahari wedding. Each region and community prided itself on its marriage specials, with dishes cooked by the community. Alu ke gutke tempered with jumbu (Himalayan chives imported from Tibet) and crowned with deep-fried whole red chillies and fresh coriander is a treat Tawe ki sabziyan: Standard fare is often served mindlessly at almost all marriages, without taking into account individual variations Murg musallam: An accomplished cook can infuse it with an original flavour which gets lost in the cafetaria approach to the menu

Marriages and memorable meals are inseparable like Siamese twins. Well, things may have changed more than a little with times, shaadi ka khaana is often not what it is supposed to be but there is no denying that bridal banquets are a major, indispensable part of the ritual. Even the most reasonable and undemanding would-be ‘in-laws’ insist that the groom’s party should be fed well. For the hassled bride’s father obviously it is a matter of honour—other ‘give and take’ takes place away from the public gaze behind the festive scenes of song and dance but what is served and the way it is served leaves a distinct taste in everyone’s mouth.

As the adage has it, ensuring that your witnesses testify in the court when summoned and the baraatis are well fed is an onerous task indeed. Once you have done this you can be really carefree. The long and short of the story is that while marriages may be made in heaven, the food that is coupled with the occasion has to be cooked on ground level with all the earthly travails.

There is a microscopic minority among mortals who brook no constraints and can order literally the moon. When the steel king Lakshmi Mittal gave his daughter away a few years back, the banquet he laid out for the baraatis set impossible standards for others to follow. If the venue is the palace at Versailles then surely the starters have to match: the chaat khomcha from purani Dilli or even good old Munna Maharaj, the darling chef of Marwari billionaires, can only merge into the manicured shrubs. But then we are not talking about shaadi ka khaana this is life imitating not art but fantastic kitsch—a cross-dressed entry aspiring to dwell simultaneously in Disneyland and Guinness Book of Records.

It is not as if all the ‘Richie Rich’ are obsessed by the spectacular extravaganzas. There are lovers of food like Shiv and Archan Jatia of Delhi (of Hyatt Regency) who spent months planning the menu for their daughter’s wedding. Jiggs was roped in early and served as the ‘in-house’ impressario. Osman Miyan, representing Tunda from Lucknow, grilled the ‘melt-in-the-mouth’ subz galautii, Bablu dazzled everyone with his jumbo stuffed paranthas a specialty of Rambabu Paratha Bhandaar in Agra, Pankaj of Ram Asre, again from Lucknow, sent Yadav, his Jeeves, to ensure that balai ki gilauri and santre ki barfi were not put in shade by the delicate craftsmanship of master patissier Schuetzenberger who had flown in from Hongkong.

The ‘never-before-and-never-since’ guest appearance of Sadanand Maiyya of the legendary MTR at Bangalore with his fabulous tiffin for breakfast left everyone speechless. Harbans Singh of Sheeshmahal at Amritsar was there too. This was the Mother of all Designer Dinners, with accomplished maestros competing with each other to tickle the distinguished gourmet guests’ palate. Then there was the Marwari sajan ghoth, with the challenge that the best in the land be served in formal family setting with the proviso that all the delicacies should conform to the customary requirements. This meant that anything innovative that could be tainted as outlandish or exotically experimental had to be eschewed.

One recalls with great fondness some marriage meals partaken in childhood and early adolescence in the hills of Uttaranchal. The menu at an Almora Brahmin-Thakur wedding was basic yet mouthwateringly beautiful. Puffed up poories with sweet-and-sour reddish brown kaddu ka gajaika (dried red pumpkin mash), cooked with bhang seeds (cannabis, absolutely free from addictive toxicity in this form), sinus-clearing, brilliant yellow tears-streaming pungent mustard raita, dark violet darhim ki khatai (pomegranate chutney), and kheer thick, creamy and cloyingly sweet garnished with grated coconut was the solitary sweet.

The next morning, kunwar kalewa comprised another round of poories, singal—jumbo jalebi looklikes made with fermented semolina-rice batter mildly sweet, barely noticeable, flavored with saunf, aloo ke gutke tempered with jumbu (Himalayan chives imported from Tibet) crowned with deep fried whole red chillies and fresh coriander. Thickset milky white dahi served from wooden thekis accompanied the celebratory breakfast. Then came suji ka halwa oozing ghee followed by steaming hot brass glasses of tea with just a hint of cardamom that were endlessly plied. In the remote villages, poories were served in the night (when rice was taboo) and rice in the morning brunch was served with vegetables grown at home, leafy greens spinach and mustard, capsicum, gourds and arabi supplemented the good old pumpkin.

Everything was prepared without onion and garlic. Mixed daal was a must as were the raita khatai and kheer. The emphasis was on quantity and quality in that order; variety was considered pretentious.

Many moons later, a meal in a Maithil marriage exposed us to a totally different experience. Here, in Madhubani/Darbhanga, no one had any inhibitions about devouring nonvegetarian dishes and fish bhaja was greatly relished. Variety was the spice of life. Pattals were arranged in a teasing manner –the diner felt the stretch as he reached out to different ‘courses’. The hosts took, what appeared to us as sadistic, delight in overfeeding the guests- rosogullas were doled out on our plate in dozens and nothing could be served single only double measures were considered auspicious, veteran local baraatis one suspected had fortified themselves with a bhang ka gola reputed to stoke appetite. Kheer, of course, was there but the sweetness, seductive sweetness, overflowed from juicy mangoes that were consumed by everyone, including yours truly, in kilos.

Dahi was treated as digestive what amazed us was that the ‘dose’ was hardly homeopathic. Conversation revolved round food and was more interesting than any song-and-dance number. Muslim marriages were and continue to be occasions for close encounters of drooling kind with biryani and kebab, qorma and kofta, do pyaza, musallam, muzaffar together with zarda, sevian and phirni. These have, for generations, been the heart and soul of the shaadi ki daawat in Hyderabad, Bhopal and Lucknow. Accomplished amateur cooks famous for their signature delicacies were in great demand in the marriage season. Some trusted retired family retainers were at times recalled from their village to recreate the old magic

The wazwan—both the Muslim and the Pandit variety—is a key element in Kashmiri marriages. The multi-course polychromatic feast is prepared by a professional and offers many delicacies, vegetarian and nonvegetarian, that are hard to cook at home like the gushtaba/rista. The spread is as much a feast for the eyes as it is for the palate. Bengal has bohu bhaath that strives to showcase all six basic flavours, including (believe it or not) the bitter! South Indian marriage meals are far more understated but are no less elaborate or elegant. Take the Kerala sadyam, for instance, that cuts across religious divides and has unusual desserts like prathaman. Christian weddings have always been associated with treats like roasts, bakes and cakes. These too display remarkable regional variations. Tribal marriage feasts in the North-Eastern states of India illustrate the harmonious coexistence of diverse delicacies.

In Goa, Mangalore, Tamil Nadu and Kerala many Western classics have been wonderfully Indianised. Who was it who said, ‘East is East and West is West and the twain shall never meet?’

Half the fun or more was derived from the shared labour in festive food production. Friends along with extended joint families chipped in weeks before the event to ‘organise’ the stocks of home-made laddoos, balushahi, wadian, pickles, chutneys etc. that were not only consumed but were gift-packed for the departing guests; the tedium of these kitchen chores was relieved by choral singing of traditional folk songs. This is what made marriage meals so special. The occasion signified the sealing of a special relationship: roti- beti ka naata—shared meals with new relations. Each region and community prided itself for its marriage specials.

Tradition, alas, does no longer dictate the marriage menu. The tribe of orthodox is dwindling in all communities and prescriptions and prohibition are not always observed. Most hosts err on the side of caution and stick to the popular- oh-so-boring, predictable pan-Indian menu. Tandoori items from Punjab rub shoulders with imitators of Avadh and Hyderabad.

The unimaginative ‘cafeteria’ approach encourages painless choices. Rajasthani gatte ki subzi can mindlessly be placed by the side of Goan prawn curry. Even this is for the ethnically oriented adventurers. The rest are quite happy with set menus wherein the soup and starters seldom stray beyond tomato and sweet corn, myriad chicken, fish, paneer tikka, fried baby corn or button mushrooms, followed by the ubiquitous makhani daal, kadahi or shahi paneer, tawe ki subziyan, mixed vegetables/ jaalfarezi, gobhi masala, mushroom mutter, alu jaipuri/banarasi, raita , salad, papad, assorted breads and pulav.

A more lavish spread has, in addition, a fruit juice and a chaat stall, a pasta, noodle or pav bhaaji station. Ice cream and gulab jamun are staple desserts that are commonly enriched with jalebi/rabarhi or gajar ka halwa. Depending on one’s budget, items can be added or deleted. The caterers and the tentwallas take care of the rest.

The trouble is that food is prepared more often than not by non-professional seasonal cooks who have learnt whatever they claim on the job, helped by unskilled daily wage earners and recipes adhere to the lowest common denominator of taste. Often, there is a package deal including ‘food, service and decorations’ and it is not surprising that the invitees encounter insipid, indifferent fare that can only induce dyspepsia. The wise eat at home before embarking on a marriage meal expedition.

There is no reason this sorry state of culinary affairs should be allowed to continue. What is required is a balance between quality and quantity: A return to traditional fare – retro dining if you please- can pleasantly blend ‘novelty’ and ethnic chic. Making a public display of disposable wealth via wasted food can never substitute for warm, personalised hospitality. True, shaadi ka khaana has to be richer than everyday fare, extraordinary and interesting. This doesn’t mean that your responsibility ends with ordering the usual humdrum meal with the caterer. Don’t let the proletarian contractor or the patrician five-star banquet manager cajole or bully you into falling in the irritating yet expensive trap with the phrase: aajkal ye hi chalta hai!

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