WEBSIDE HUMOUR
Run for cover

Mary was discussing the various aspects and possible outcome of the insurance policy with the clerk at the insurance agency. During the discussion, she asked. "Suppose I take the life insurance for my husband today for a million dollars, and what if he dies tomorrow ? What will I get?" The clerk eyed her suspiciously and replied, "Probably a life sentence."

A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring. This man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion sense." The man walks up to him and says, "I didn’t know you were into earrings." "Don’t make such a big deal out of this, it’s only an earring," he replies sheepishly. His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then his curiosity prods him to say, "So, how long have you been wearing one?" "Ever since my wife found it in my car...."

Wife to husband: "If I die, I want you to promise me, you’ll let my mother ride in the first car with you in the funeral procession." Husband: "Okay, but it will ruin my day."

Just as the movie was about to start in a cinema hall, a person from the centre of the row got up and started working his way across.

"Excuse me, sorry, oops, excuse me, pardon me, gotta hurry, oops, excuse me." By the time the person got to me I was trying to see the screen and I was a little impatient so I said, "Couldn’t you have done this a little earlier?"

"No!" was the loud whisper, "The ‘turn off your cell phone please’ message just flashed up on the screen and mine is out in the car."

Compiled by Sunil Sharma