A grandson walks down memory lane

Rattan Iqbal Singh

As I sat down and thought about my personal experiences with the "great" man, I realised how my life had been influenced by my grandfather because of my interaction with him during my formative years. All family members, including me, lovingly called him "Chachaji". In a way this universal name that the family across the board had for him made him approachable. Everyone was seen as equal (from the standpoint of attention and importance) in his eyes, and everyone got his or her share of personal attention, life's lessons, coaching and an opportunity to know and interact with him.

He achieved prominence not through money, force or political capital, but through the power of his brain and the ability to do unconditional good for the general public. He always had his pulse on people's psychology.

My grandfather converted all the trials and tribulations of life — be it his role in the freedom struggle or ill-treatment by the monarchy during early years of his life — into positive energy and the determination to succeed. He had the resolve to forgive and forget and do good for the masses. This purpose and grit fuelled his life as well as his political career. 

He used to tell me and my brothers and sisters: “Be determined, have the fortitude to do the right things, fight for justice, and overcome hardships”. My grandfather, in his own indirect way, would tell us to set our mind on what we wanted to achieve and then channel our willpower into achieving our goal. “Don't get disheartened and don't look back,” was his advice. I never heard him complain about life, about what he could have got but did not, of how he had the toughest time during the key political positions he held, and the resistance he got from other political leaders. He just maintained a can-do attitude, kept looking and moving forward, built people around him, shared his knowledge, and gave his time and love to everyone he came in contact with.

He was a self-made man and had great respect for individuals who worked hard and achieved success on their own. When I passed my engineering exam and was selected into the Punjab Engineering College, Chandigarh, on my own merit, he was so happy and proud because it was through perseverance and not by using any connections or political help.

An orator par excellence, I remember how on occasions, he used to take us to official functions where there were senior political leaders delivering speeches to a large public gathering. Before the event, I witnessed the preparation that went into the  drafting, editing and rehearsal of the speech. He would solicit advice from family members and his staff. 

During the function, I saw him listening intently to each and every one who spoke. He made mental notes on key topics covered by each speaker and would not only deliver his prepared remarks but also effectively encapsulate the highlights of each of the previous speakers. His speeches displayed a remarkable sense of humour, peppered with his favourite quotes. To the question how he could remember so much and deliver so effectively, his reply was that it takes lot of preparation and practice, patience, understanding and study of people's personalities and viewpoints and thinking from others' vantage point and not just your own.

Through interaction with him, I observed how he gave respect, time, and personal attention to one and all, without exception. He would take advice from his staff, family members, and even from us kids on complex political topics. His favourite leading line was: “So, what do you think about this situation?” It made the person to whom the question was directed feel important and involved. After years, I now understand why he was doing it. This made him think from a common man's point of view and gather different perspectives. It made him think about how to make his communication and messages simple. He was trying to understand varied views because he was going to deliver the messages and make decisions on behalf of people with varied background, experiences, motives, age group, and knowledge. This made him think about different possibilities and how to message it appropriately. 

Prayer gave him inner strength. No matter how busy he was, he always found time for his morning prayers. He had a gurdwara set up in every place he stayed. He was very knowledgeable, not only about Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji, but also about the Bible, Bhagavadgita and the Koran. I used to watch how particular he was with the recitation of the verses and how he prayed daily to God to give him strength to do the right thing. Following his example, I try to pray every day as well and find it immensely helpful.

My grandfather never forgot the support he got from his brothers during his early years. He always took care of his family members and  invested time and whatever limited resources he had to make sure they were comfortable. I used to read the newspaper to him daily and highlight the key news whenever I visited him. This was another of his ways to spend time with us while he got an update on current affairs. He inculcated the habit of reading and an awareness about current affairs in us. 

In the evening, when he came back after long hours of work, I and my brothers and sisters played with him and would help him to change his clothes. I still remember pulling his socks, which took all of our strength as kids as these were tight fitting given these had to be worn under the chooridar pajamas that went well with his elegant outfit. It was a fun time as he played and took time to unwind. 

A believer in good health, he used to take a morning walk religiously and many a times I would accompany him. We discussed how things were, my work and life in school or college and even the day's news. When I asked him about lessons of life and how to lead a better life and be successful in relationships and at work. All he would say is: "Believe in yourself, give your mind some free time to think. Work hard but have the strength to accept and leave the outcome in God's hands once you have done your best."

He had immense love for us and enormous patience with kids. I still remember the liberties we took in his personal bedroom, played on his bed, watched TV while he was asleep, and even carried the TV in his room to our room while he slept at night. Not even once once did he get upset or asked us stop messing up his room. Reflecting on his patience, love, and freedom we got now makes me more tolerant towards my own children and helps me to have fun with them. 

After his presidency, I had gone to visit him during my vacation. I needed new eye glasses and had mentioned just once to him that I had accidently broken my glasses when he asked me what had happened to them. The next thing I know is that an appointment with his personal doctor was made. He himself took me in his official car to the doctor, sat down with me, got my eyes checked, helped to select my glasses, and then got them prepared for me. In spite of being so busy, he had time for such a small thing.  He made you feel important and gave you that personal attention which made you love and respect for him all the more. 

Not only do I admire, respect and salute him, I also miss him. I will always look up to him and be motivated by him. He worked tirelessly for his country and its people and always had a positive outlook towards life. He epitomised the determination to achieve success and strive to realise one’s dream against all odds.  

The writer is Director, PriceWaterhouseCoopers, US.