Footsteps to redeem honour

Subhash Rajta

It’s been six months since a schoolgirl was brutally raped and murdered in Kotkhai, 60 km from Shimla. People in the hill state are still shocked, hurt and very angry. Amidst this widespread anger and anguish, there’s embarrassment, too. A vast majority of girl students across the state still can’t bring themselves to talk about the bone-chilling incident. A strange sense of shame keeps them from giving words to their feelings, says Sohan Chandel, a psychologist and motivational speaker, who is out to change this.

“I must have spoken to more than 1,000 girl students and asked the, if they knew what happened with Gudiya,” says Chandel. Every time, the girls would hang their heads in shame, avoid eye contact and look elsewhere. “Of all the girls that I spoke to, just two girls could bring themselves to utter the word ‘rape’,” he says.

Like everyone else, Chandel was shaken and outraged by the incident. Like everyone else, he wanted justice for Gudiya and severe punishment for the perpetrators of the crime. But unlike others, he didn’t want to stop at that. He decided to go beyond demanding justice for Gudiya. He resolved to use the tragedy to challenge the mentality and social system that create such monsters; sensitise the young and old on domestic violence and encourage women to speak up against incidents of abuse. “We need to keep Gudiya alive in the minds of people for as long as possible. She will keep reminding us of what’s wrong with us, our society, and maybe encourage and inspire a few to try and bring about some change,” Chandel says.

To get his message across and personally understand what people thought about the incident, Chandel decided to ‘Walk for Gudiya’, meet as many people as possible, and deliver talks in educational institutions during his roughly 300 km journey across the state. On December 4, exactly six months after Gudiya had gone missing, he started the walk from where her body was recovered, aiming to culminate it in Kangra on December 16, the day another Gudiya, Nirbhaya, was violated and brutalised in Delhi five years back.

As he walked from one town to another, spoke to girls in schools and colleges, he was stunned by the overwhelming reluctance of the girls to share their views. “Knowing our society, I knew not many girls would come forward. But I could have never imagined the problem was so deep-rooted,” Chandel laments. “If girls can’t even talk about an incident that happened with someone else, are they ever going to speak up if, god forbid, something happens with them or someone they know.” 

For Chandel, it’s a sad reflection of our education system and the way families bring up their children. “If parents don’t open up with their children, teachers keep skipping the chapters on private parts of the human body, and society continues to attach shame with sexual crimes, women will keep finding it tough to speak up,” he says. As for boys, as expected, they were far more forthcoming. “All of them felt for Gudiya, but I did sense a little casualness in the tone of many of them.”

Apart from the ironic and discomforting silence of the girls, Chandel feels the journey has been fruitful and encouraging. Most people were appreciative, offered him food and stay free of cost. A few took him to their homes, and a few others, not knowing how else to show their solidarity, would push some money into his pocket. “It was overwhelming. Thousands took selfies with me and posted them on social media, showing their support for the cause. The response reinforced the fact that most of us are decent and well-meaning human beings,” he says.

It’s a good sign that people continue to feel strongly for Gudiya, that they haven’t allowed time to allay their pain and anger. Yet, all this has changed nothing for Gudiya and her family. The perpetrators are still safe, unidentified. “Things have gotten worse for her family. A daughter in the family has dropped out from school. So one Gudiya is dead, and the other has left the school. Shame on us,” says Chandel. Indeed.