Break free from the male mould

Ratna Raman

THIS year only six days separate Holi and Women's Day, providing an occasion for airing that well chronicled idea about how men's lives are different from those of women, though they belong to the same species. Yet, as discussions about bloody feuds, battles, wars and Partition reveal, the trauma and brutality of war only ravage and brutalise the bodies, minds and psyches of women, plunging them into quagmires seldom traversed by men.

But the moot question is — in peace time do things become really very different for women? They have been conditioned to live each day, dogged by fear and haunted by their vulnerability to violence, rape, betrayal, censure and disapproval, even if they are sheltered from poverty and hunger. 

The festival of Holi, for instance, celebrates the advent of spring. Many Hindi films have depicted this festival with dancing, singing and abundant colour. In real life, away from the cinematic stage and the mythic story in which poor Holika is burnt as a result of the power struggle between her brother Hiranyakashipu and nephew Prahlad, women continue to be pawed and mauled by men, facing harassment diurnally, under the guise of merry making. 

The world of cinema and theatre or the stage, wherein women are allowed to perform, are spaces in which they can dance and sing with gay abandon. Yet, the hash-tag revolution has brought to light the ugliness lurking in the side-wings and off-screen. Women continue to be manipulated by the lens of patriarchal perception in innumerable ways. 

Physical assault notwithstanding, male projection of beauty and desirability has always controlled women. Worldwide, women continue to prolong youthfulness with botox injections, hair dyes, wrinkle lifts, breast and butt implants and other surgical interventions. Young brides-to-be starve themselves into eating disorders to fit into impossibly small-size wedding dresses. Meanwhile, older women work hard at whittling themselves down to size zero, since this is the number and dimension that they are trained to value the most about themselves. 

Surely in peacetime, women must be allowed their share of what the French term jouissance (physical or intellectual pleasure)? 

For women to re-discover the physical, emotional and intellectual pleasures promised by jouissance, they need to recall the iconic women in their lives — mothers, sisters, companions, teachers, artists, service providers — bustling with energetic activity and joie-de-vivre, and comfortable in their skins and in facing the challenges of each day.

 Despite the frenetically busy world that we inhabit, the past remains peopled with iconic figures that continue to serve as beacons. There is the need to find strong women from our history, our myths, our stories and narratives. While Women's Day is celebrated only once a year, we are an ancient civilisation, cradling multiple cultures. We all need to delve into our pasts, to find stories of remarkable women, who lived life on their own terms.

Celebrations, music, dance and the reverberating joy of collective participation are important markers of human life, for both men and women. Growing up in New Delhi in nuclear families, with eclectic influences,  melodious lyrics of film songs sung by Noorjehan, Lata and Asha Mangeshkar among others were mesmerising. M.S. Subbalakshmi not only regaled us with Carnatic music and bhajans, but performed on film stage, transforming into a flesh and blood Mirabai.

 In this young democracy of the 1960s and 1970s, women existed in a multiplicity of roles  in the public and the private sphere. It is then I discovered Andal, an old icon from the ninth century, whose songs formed part of the repertoire of classical Bharatanatyam dancing. A profound lyricist besotted with Lord Thirumal, 16-year-old Andal mystically merged with godhead at the temple at Srirangam. Andal's life is similar to that of Mirabai, who also defied social conventions. Andal's identity as a Tamil alvar (saint poet) is significant since worldwide religious authority has remained beyond the reach of women.

The daughter of a garland maker and priest, young Andal often adorned herself with the garlands that were to be consecrated. Chastised by her father, she wept copiously, although we know little of her mother's opinion on the subject. Visited by the Lord in a dream, Andal's father learns of the deity's preference for garlands used by Andal. This frees Andal from constraints that shackle innumerable women even in contemporary times. Andal refuses marriage, an option defining the lives of most young girls even at present. She chooses to wander with gopis revelling in the intrinsic beauty of rural life. Composing extraordinary poetry, she delights the community, and pursues Thirumal with a passionate abandon. Despite the distance of myth and time, Andal continues to be a relevant icon for our times, both onstage and offstage. 

In extraordinary erotic poetry, Andal voices her strong desire for Narayana\Krishna and details their intimate physical conjugality. She clearly articulates desires pertaining to adornment, intimacy and conduct. She has strong opinions, is aware of her rights, and shares great friendships with Alvar men and women of her village. Her passionate songs are a testimony to her belief in herself as an equal. Intensely moving and mellifluous, her compelling poetry charts an incredible life, lived well.

 Andal's poetry reveals an agency and freedom that is noteworthy, being free from both prescription and restrictions. She scripts and choreographs her life's work, propelling a personal and spiritual journey with zest and tenacity. Tweaking the popular cigarette advertisement, women of today could transact a priceless exchange, and “Live Life Andalwise,” experiencing its richness.