Don’t let the fuse blow

Samir Parikh

Losing one’s temper is not unnatural or abnormal. Anger is an emotion that is experienced by all of us at some point of time in our life. It is typically a reaction to any factor, often a secondary emotion than can arise as a reaction to other emotions such as insecurity, jealousy, fear, etc. Remember, it is normal to get angry but it is your choice to channelize the anger. However, following are some of the points we could keep in mind to manage our temper.

1Express your anger. Anger, if expressed productively, can have a positive impact. Suppressing or holding back anger is unhealthy. Develop your emotional awareness and adopt alternative and more constructive means of expressing your anger. Therefore, we should not hesitate to talk about it. In fact, emotional expression can be in the form of art, dance, movement, written expression or any other form of creative expression. Cultivate activities like swimming, dancing, arts, theater or other more outlets for your energy.

2Try a problem solving approach. Instead of trying to avoid the triggers that make you angry, it is more helpful to focus on a solution-focused approach. There are multiple external factors which are out of our control; however, we instead need to start identifying the potential triggers and find alternative means of reacting to them. Channelise your energy towards solving the problems instead of indulging in a blame game.

3Identify the triggers. There are many situations that we can identify as predictable triggers for us to lose our temper. It is important to become aware of these triggers and learn to catch them at the right time. Often being prepared to expect a trigger in itself gives us more time to think and act more productively. Stop and think of the consequences of your anger.

4Take time out. In times of crisis or during a heated discussion or outburst of anger, it is best to take time out and temporarily walk away from the situation if possible. It gives the person time to calm down.

5Physical exercise. When a person is angry, the individual experiences a surge of energy, which is typically externalised in the form of shouting or aggression. Instead, the person should be encouraged to carry out regular physical activity, be it in the form of a sport, workout, dance or even walking or jogging.

The writer is director, Department of Mental Health and Behavioural Sciences, Fortis Healthcare