Saturday, September 16, 2000

10 dollar bill

TOMMY’S house is packed with relatives for Christmas dinner. Grandpa calls six-year-old Tommy and starts asking about school, girlfriends and other stuff he can think of. After a while, grandpa notices that Tommy is loosing interest in the conversation so he pulls out two bills from his wallet to see if he can keep him interested. A ten and a twenty dollar bill. He shows both bills to Tommy and tells him that he can keep any one he chooses.

Tommy reaches over and grabs the ten dollar bill. Grandpa pretty surprised and upset about the unwise decision his grandchild made, pulls out another ten dollar bill to see if it was a mistake. Again, he tells Tommy to take one of the bills and keep it. Tommy grabs the other ten. Grandpa again is surprised and upset. He takes Tommy over to one of the uncles and shows him how dumb Tommy is in choosing the ten over the twenty. Grandpa goes on and on showing every uncle and cousin and each time Tommy chooses the ten over the twenty. Grandpa finally shows the stunt to daddy. Daddy’s quite surprise but doesn’t pay too much attention at the moment. A few hours later, daddy who is very concerned about Tommy’s poor decision, walks up to him and asks him if he knows the difference between a ten dollar bill and a twenty.

"Of course," answers Tommy.

"So why did you always choose the ten over the twenty?" asks dad. Tommy, with a wide smile answers, "Well dad, if I would have chosen the first twenty dollar bill, do you think grandpa would have played the game fifteen more times?"


Guess where!

A YOUNG and foolish pilot wanted to sound cool on the aviation frequencies.

So, this was his first time approaching a field during the nighttime.

Instead of making any official requests to the tower, he said:

"Guess who?"

The controller switched the field lights off and replied: "Guess where!"


DURING the celebration of their 50th Wedding Anniversary the wife noticed a tear in her husbands eye.

"I never realised how sentimental you are," she said.

"That’s not it," he sniffed.

"Remember when your Father caught us in the barn, and he said if I didn’t marry you he’d send me to jail for 50 years?"

"Well, today I would have been a free man !"

Where’s the hat?

HER grandson is playing in the water, while Sophie is standing on the beach not wanting to get her feet wet, when all of a sudden, a huge wave appears from nowhere and crashes directly over the spot where the boy is in the ocean. The water recedes and the boy is no longer there. He simply vanished.
Sophie holds her hands to the sky and cries, "Lord, how could you? Have I not been a wonderful mother and grandmother? Have I not tried my very best to live a life that you would be proud of?"

Just then, another huge wave appears out of nowhere and crashes on the beach. As the water recedes, the boy is standing there, smiling, splashing around as if nothing had happened.
A loud voice booms from the sky, "I have returned your grandson. Are you satisfied?" Sophie responds, "Well, he was wearing a hat."

Only 25 cents

ONE night, Tim was walking home when, all of a sudden, a thief jumped on him. Tim and the thief were began to wrestle. They rolled about on the ground and Tim put up a tremendous fight.

However, the thief managed to get the better of him and pinned him to the ground.

The thief then went through Tim’s pockets and searched him.

All the thief could find on Tim was 25 cents.

The thief was so surprised at this that he asked Tim why he had bothered to fight so hard for a 25 cents.

"Was that all you wanted?" Tim replied, "I thought you were after the five hundred dollars I’ve got in my shoe!"

Culled from various sites on the Internet by Sunil Sharma

This feature was published on August 26, 2000