Saturday, November 11, 2000
N E T P I C K I N G


The right way

There were two guys on a motorcycle driving down the road. The driver was wearing a leather jacket that didnít have a zipper or any buttons.

Finally he stopped the bike and told the other guy," I canít drive anymore with the air hitting me in my chest."

After thinking for a while he decided to put the coat on backwards to block the air from hitting him. So they were driving down the road and they came around this curb and

wrecked. The farmer that lived there called the police and told them what happened.

The police asked him, "Are either of them showing any life signs?"

The farmer then said, "Well, that first one was Ďtil I turned his head around the right way."

 

Jesus and Satan

One day, Jesus and Satan decided to settle which one of them was the best programmer. God was chosen to be the judge. Jesus and Satan got 10 hours to create the best program they could for the PC. When 10 hours had past, the power suddenly went out, and all the data disappeared from both monitors. Moments later, the power came back on. On Jesusís monitor, all the data had returned to its previous state, whereas Satanís monitor remained blank.

Satan got really upset and complained to God.

God was quiet for a moment, then he laughed and said, "Jesus saves!"

Better job

Grandpa and granddaughter were sitting talking when she asked, "Did God make you, Grandpa?"

"Yes, God made me," the grandfather answered.

A few minutes later, the little girl asked him, "Did God make me too?"

"Yes, He did," the older man answered.

For a few minutes, the little girl seemed to be studying her grandpa, as well as her own reflection in the mirror, while her grandfather wondered what was running through her mind.

At last she spoke up. "You know, Grandpa," she said, "Godís doing a lot better job lately."

Usherís revenge

A man had a ticket for the theater but when he was seated by the usher, he found that he was too far from the stage. He whispered to the usher, "This is a mystery play, and I have to watch a mystery close up. Get me a better seat, and Iíll give you a handsome tip."

The usher moves him into the second row, and the man hands the usher a quarter. The usher looks at the quarter, frowns at him, then leans over and whispers, ............ "The wife was the one who did it".

These jokes have been culled from various sites of the Net by Sunil Sharma

  This feature was published on October 28, 2000