|Saturday, November 23, 2002||
JOE had asked Bob to help him out with the deck after work, so Bob went straight over to Joe's place. When they got to the door, Joe went straight to his wife, gave her a hug and told her how beautiful she was and how much he had missed her at work. When it was time for supper, he complimented his wife on her cooking, kissed her and told her how much he loved her. Once they were working on the deck, Bob told Joe that he was surprised that he fussed so much over his wife. Joe said that he'd started this about six months ago, it had revived their marriage and things couldn't be better. Bob thought he'd give it a go. When he got home, he gave his wife a massive hug, kissed her and told her that he loved her. His wife burst into tears.
Bob was confused and
asked why she was crying. She said, "This is the worst day of my
life. First, little Billy fell off his bike and twisted his ankle.
Then, the washing machine broke and flooded the basement. And now, you
come home drunk!"
A student was heading home for the holidays. When she got to the airline counter, she presented her ticket to New York. As she gave the agent her luggage, she made the remark, "I'd like you to send my green suitcase to Hawaii, and my red suitcase to London." The confused agent said, "I'm sorry, we can't do that." "Really? I am so relieved to hear you say that because that's exactly what you did to my luggage last year!"
All you can drink!
There was a business man driving down this country road when he spotted a little boy who had a lemonade stand. Since it was hot and he was thirsty, he decided to stop. Once he got up to the little boy's stand, he noticed a sign that said "All you can drink 10 cents". Well, he thought that it was an awful small glass, but since it was only 10 cents for all you can drink, he decided to get some anyway. Well, he gave the boy a dime, and shot down the whole glass in one swig. He slapped it back onto the table and said, "Fill them up." and the kid said, "Sure thing, that'll be 10 cents." To this the business man said, "But your sign says all you can drink for a dime."
"It is," the little boy replied, "that's all you can drink for a dime."
— Culled from the
Net by Sunil Sharma