Saturday, October 14, 2006

Weak spot

A man goes to an eye specialist. The receptionist asks him why he is there.

The man complains, "I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes." The receptionist asks, "Have you ever seen a doctor?" The man replies, "No, just spots."

Job well done

The classified ad said, "Wanted: a very experienced lumberjack". A man answered the ad and was asked to describe his experience. "Iíve worked at the Sahara Forest."

"You mean the Sahara Desert," said the interviewer. The man laughed and answered, "Oh sure, thatís what they call it now."

Workable will

A man went to his lawyer and said, "I would like to make a will but I donít know exactly how to go about it." The lawyer said, "No problem, leave it all to me." "Well I knew you were going to take the biggest slice, but Iíd like to leave a little to my children too."

Sales talk

A salesman who was out on his territory had a heart attack in his motel room and died. The motel manager called the salesmanís company and related the tragedy to the sales manager.

The sales manager received the news in a nonchalant manner and told the motel manager, "Return his samples by freight and search his pants for orders.

Patient pays

The surgeon told his patient when he woke up after having been operated: "Iím afraid weíre going to have to operate you again. Because, you see, I forgot my rubber gloves inside you."

"Well, if itís just because of them, Iíd rather pay for them if you just leave me alone."

Name power

The manager of a large office called a new recruit to his office and enquired: "What is your name?" "John," the new guy replied.

The manager scowled, "Look, I donít know the place you worked at before, but I donít call anyone by their first name. I refer to my employees by their last names only. Now that we have got that straight, what is your last name?"

The new guy sighed and said, "Darling. My name is John Darling." "Okay, John, the next thing I want to tell you is..."

ó Compiled by Sunil Sharma