Saturday, December 6, 2008

True salesman

AN inexperienced real estate salesman asked his boss if he could refund the deposit to an angry customer who had discovered that the lot he had bought was under water. "What kind of salesman are you?" the boss scolded.

"Get out there and sell him a boat."

Wrong bus

A drunken man gets on the bus late one night, staggers up the aisle, and sits next to an elderly nun. She looks the man up and down and says, "Iíve got news for you. Youíre going straight to hell." The man jumps up out of his seat and shouts, "Good heavens, Iím on the wrong bus."

Argument over

A husband and wife are arguing over some issue.

After much of a discussion, the wife finally retorted: "Tell me dear, do you want to win or be happy?

Smart dog

A man walked by a table in a hotel and noticed three men and a dog playing cards. The dog was playing extraordinarily.

"This is a very smart dog," the man commented. "Heís really not so smart," said one of the players. "Every time he gets a good hand, he wags his tail."

Picture perfect

A wealthy man sat in his attorneyís office. "Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?" the lawyer asked.

"Give me the bad news first."

"Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars."

"Thatís the bad news?" the man asked incredulously. "I canít wait to hear the terrible news." "Itís of you and your mistress."

ó Compiled by Sunil Sharma