ulta pulta
Spirited MLAs
Jaspal Bhatti 

If the ministers and MLAs of Punjab are asked how many of them are interested in going on a trip to Scotland for studying the manufacturing process of Scotch Whiskey, most of them will run bare feet towards the airport. I heard a group of MLAs flew to Scotland in haste to study the Scotch manufacturing process without getting their tour approved.

Many of us, perhaps, donít understand the spirit that these enthusiasts possess. They can foresee that in the next Assembly elections, it would be difficult to entice the voters with cheap country liquor. With the economic health of the voters improving, they might expect Scotch on the rocks. The major criticism these MLAs are drawing is what was the need of going all the way to Scotland. They could always gulp down a couple of bottles here and come up with some better solution.

Those who are in the business of brewing`A0illicit liquor with the blessings of their political masters might have pressurised them. "Sir, we have the experience of turning, barley, rice, wheat, sugarcane, lizards, snakes or anything into hooch. Why canít we make`A0Scotch too?" If the MLAs in question want to go on a study tour of Scotch-making on a pressing demand from the liquor industry, then their tour can be fully sponsored by any liquor baron.

A devout and hardened alcoholic suddenly formed an NGO and began working for water conservation in Punjab. A friend asked the reason for the unexpected change of heart. He said, "We need to save every drop of water for the future Scotch industry."