Watch the wall

A funeral service was being held for a woman who had just passed away. As the pallbearers were carrying the casket out they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive.

The woman lives for 10 more years and then dies. As the pallbearers were walking out carrying the casket, the husband frantically cried: "Watch out for the wall!"

Argument rules

Any argument that a man and woman are involved in, the woman gets the last word.

Anything a man says afterwards is the beginning of a new argument.

Crime check

An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the question, "Have you ever been arrested?" he wrote, "No."

The next question was intended for people who had answered in the affirmative to the previous question, was "Why?"

The applicant answered it anyway, "Never got caught."

Thank you, dear

While reading the newspaper, Walter came across an article about a beautiful actress and model, who married a boxer who was not noted for his IQ.

"Iíll never understand," he said to his wife, "why the biggest jerks get the most attractive wives."

His wife replied, "Why, thank you, dear."

Number one sport

A woman, while touring a small South American country was shown a bullfight.

The guide told her, "This is our number one sport."

The horrified woman said, "Isnít that revolting?"

"No," the guide replied, "revolting is our number two sport."

Compiled by Sunil Sharma