Webside HUMOUR
Helping hand

A cub scout was half an hour late to its den meeting. The den mother asked them severely, "Why are you so late?"

"Oh," said one boy, "we were helping an old man cross the street."

"That’s a nice thing for scouts to do," said the mother. She paused. "But it shouldn’t make you half an hour late."

"Well, you see," said another boy, "he didn’t want to go."

The man charged into the jewellery shop, slammed his fists angrily on the showcase, removed a wristwatch from his pocket and shook it under the nose of the owner.

"You said this watch would last me a lifetime," he yelled. "Yeah," admitted the owner. "But you looked pretty sick the day you bought it."

From a passenger ship, one could see a bearded man on a small island, shouting and desperately waving his hands.

"Who is it?" a passenger asked the captain. "I’ve no idea. Every year, when we pass, he goes mad."

At a Sunday school class, the teacher asked a child, "Do you pray to God before lunch or dinner?" The child said, "No ma’am, my mother is a good cook."

A man asks a trainer in the gym, "I want to impress that beautiful girl, which machine can I use?"

The trainer replied, "Use the ATM outside the gym."