The Tribune - Spectrum

, April 28, 2002

Add feathers in your cap
D.C. Sharma

HAVE you ever wondered why some people command respect, and others donít ? Those commanding respect reveal their self-worth. The others canít. It is our self-image which makes the difference !

Once an officer offered tough jobs to promote his subordinates. One subordinate approached him when all the jobs were assigned: "Sir, I also want to do that !"

"Why didnít you come earlier ?" asked the officer.

"Sir, earlier I didnít believe in my potential to do that !"

"If you yourself couldít believe in your potential, how can I now believe in that ?"

Thus many ignore the opportunities when they knock at their door. Success and honour come to those who endeavour with courage and confidence.

Dr Maltz, an expert in human behaviour, says a human being acts in accordance with what he imagines to be true about himself. He would advise his patients to make up a fantasy play of himself performing as he wants to perform. The results were really astounding! His patients would overcome shyness and the lack of confidence.


The method works because it builds up a new mental picture of the performer. A public speaker who was an utter failure had tried it. He could then manage to keep his audience spell bound.

A typist who was not accurate had improved his performance. Closing his eyes gently, he would relax. In his imagination he would feel as if he was typing at great speed and with perfect accuracy. His results were as accurate as he imagined to be !

Nature has bountiful gifts for man. She has made no one inferior. With a requisite amount of will power any man can change his thought process. Even our behaviour changes when we change our thinking. Others become attuned to our thought waves. Unconsciously, they too change their behaviour towards us. It is a psychic principle that results follow the thoughts we harbour.

You too can command respect, but not at the cost of others. Envy kills your spirit to get importance. To be important you think of being so. You harbour the feelings of being important. Once you become so in your own eyes, you begin go radiate vibrations of self importance. You actually become worthy. Your mental picture materialises on the external.

The more respect you attach to your self-image, the more respect you receive from others. Like a mirror, you reflect what lies inside your mind.

To get respect, you need an enticing personality. Your positive self-image helps you to develop that also. Why would people admire Lincoln ? Simply because he would always possess that feeling about himself. He would always love and help others. That would simply boost his faith in his own popularity. His self-image had actually made him an enviable personality.

People who meet you for the first time, see your exterior first. Your self-worth is your next reflection to them. Your clothes, face expression, behaviour and etiquettes speak of you. They boost your image. They help you to make an impression upon others. It is natural for you to look pleasing as per the belief you harbour.

Some people habitually try to under-rate othersí image. That way they under-rate their own selves. Neither should a person under-rate others, nor be under-rated. Always believe in your full potential. Help others and be at peace. Exhibit your latent qualities and polish them. You can go on improving upon them every minute.

Remember, if others get respect and you donít, the fault is entirely yours! You must be under-rating your self-worth and harbouring negative feelings about your own capability. It is never too late to mend. It is not a case of spilt milk. The room for improvement is always there. Have faith and courage in your plus points. The law of Nature will always be in your favour, but only if you learn to have faith in your own abilities to accomplish your goals. If G.B. Shaw could produce his witty plays in his late eighties, and Sophocles could write ĎOedipus Colonusí at 92, why canít you improve your self-image at any stage of life ? That certainly add feathers in your cap!

Home Top