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Sunday
, September 15, 2002

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Wives have their own identities

THIS refers to "The making of an Army wife" by Gurvinder Sohi (July 7). Agreed that the life of an Armymanís wife is tough but the lives of other wives canít be compared with her life on this ground. Who can say that the life of the wife of a doctor, engineer or a businessman is easier than that of the life of an Army wife? It sounds very awkward when someone like the author remarks that a particular wife is leading a great life just because she has married an Armyman. How happy a woman is doesnít depend on the profession of her partner.

We should also not forget that everybody has his own individual identity. Then, being the wife of an armyman does not sum up a womanís identity. These wives also pursue different careers and have their own identity. Calling them ĎArmy wivesí is belittling of their personalities. And if, even then the writer says that a wife should be known by the profession, which her husband practices, we should not discriminate against the wives of businessmen, doctors, professors and even small farmers!

The writer says, "Each day is a challenge...being a complete woman is what the Indian Army wife is all about". Does becoming an Army wife define fully what a complete woman is all about? Can we say that other women are not complete women simply because they are not the wives of Armymen?

Pinki Takkar, Goraya

 


Itís eclectic...itís Malaysia

This refers to "Itís eclectic...itís Malaysia" (September 1) by Devinder Bir Kaur.

The write-up made interesting reading. The writer has given an apt description of the country. Actually, the country has to be seen to be believed.

I went to Malaysia in July 2002. All my perceptions with regard to the cleanliness, orderliness, maintenance and governance of the country have undergone a sea change. Comparison between India and Malaysia is not possible because India is nowhere near Malaysia as far as these factors are concerned.

K.S. Grewal, Chandigarh

Being true to oneself

This refers to Taru Bahlís "While searching for meaning, why rob life of fun?" (August 25). Often people, in their sincere endeavour to come upto othersí expectations, fail to fix up the priorities of their own life. Such people live with the illusion that their prime goal is to satisfy a particular group of relatives, friends etc, little realising that such an approach would hamper their mental growth and distort their spiritual vision of life. This approach is also bound to breed discontent.

No doubt one should fulfil oneís socio-cultural responsibilities and respect the ideals and expectations of people around, but one should not forget that each one of us, apart from being an integral part of the society, is an independent entity which requires a proper physical, mental and spiritual nourishment. Why should one deprive oneself of the opportunities of freedom and pleasure that harm no one and obstruct no oneís style of life.

If only we could realise that in the flexible nature of life there is scope for being happy and mentally healthy without offending the sensibilities of others, howsoever demanding they may be.

Ved Guliani, Hisar

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