HAIR to stay
Actor Anushka Sharma, in the city for the promotion of a hair care product, shares how she gets to talk more in her latest movie 
Jasmine Singh

Time gone by never comes back. Each celebrity, falling under each possible category — the old ones, the recently shot to fame ones, the unknown ones living under false impression, need to be given a copy talking about the value of time. Whether they use to wipe the lipstick is a different case altogether! Now, because the circular on time management did not reach actor Anushka Sharma on time, the lady could not make it to the conference on time — precisely an hour-and-a-half late!

But, she turned the tables upside down with a single broad smile. Strangely, everyone (we mean the ‘busy’ journos) forgot all about the time they spent sipping coffee, indulging in conversation to kill time, convincing their bosses that they would hit the office desk soon! A single smile, beautiful face with nude make-up and those curly locks (of course the hair-dresser had done a good job) did the trick. It was business immediately — sharing winter hair care tips and how to maintain those locks.

Healthy and nice hair, the actor sure has, courtesy Parachute Advanced Ayurvedic Hair Oil (expect the brand ambassador to live up to her job). “As an actor, my hair have to bear the brunt of work. Taking care of them is very important in such a situation. The Parachute oil gives the right kind of moisture during winter. In fact, my whole family uses this oil,” says Anushka in a tailor-made format. Well, well, well, the pretty face has more to her than just a maintained mop. How could we forget her minimal dialogue debut movie Rab Ney Bana Di Jodi, the bindass girl of Badmaash Company and the bubbly actor of Band Baaja Barat. C’mon fellow friends lets get rolling on this!

The smile on her face grows, “The movie Band Baja Baraat is getting a good response. Isn’t my skin glowing? (We thought it was the Parachute effect!),” she queries. Sitting calmly on a couch the actor takes up all the questions one by one, and not once did we see her rolling her hand through her hair (celebrities with long hair can’t help feeling their hair 24X7)! Three films with the same banner, Yash Raj Films; scary for a newcomer, given the fact this could lead to stereotyped roles? “Yash Raj Films have given birth to me as an actor. My loyalties lie with them and I would continue my association with them. Having said this, I also want to share that I am open to good scripts and roles.”

Anushka doesn’t fear getting typecast. “If the same banner makes three different films, they are bound to get in different elements in all the three. As an actor I get to perform on this variation,” she continues to spread the magic of her smile.

But lady, one thing can reduce the breadth of this warm smile (read competition). “Other actors like Sonam Kapoor have been around for long. They have done more work than I have. I cannot push myself to get my name registered in the competition list. I have received a lot of appreciation for my work, which is a great victory for me.” Confidence and attitude, Anushka seems to have maintained this balance on her bouncy hair. “In my first movie Rab Ney Bana Di Jodi I didn’t get to speak much, which I didn’t like. But in Band Baaja Barat I play a bubbly, straightforward girl, something that I can relate to. I say things the way they are,” Anushka adds.

She validates this attribute when she tells us she didn’t want to be a hypocrite refusing to work opposite a newcomer Ranveer Singh in Band Baaja Barat. “Shah Rukh Khan worked with me, when I was a newcomer, how could I say no to working with Randhir? Besides, he fitted the bill so well,” says Anushka whose upcoming release Patiala House, where she plays a girl from Southhall, is ready to hit the theatres in February. The girl is indeed ‘hair’ to stay!

In my first movie Rab Ney Bana Di Jodi I didn’t get to speak much, which I didn’t like. But in Band Baaja Barat I play a bubbly, straightforward girl, something that I can relate to. I say things the way they are. — Anushka Sharma

Fit as a fiddle
Jigyasa Kapoor Chimra

In a world where everyone wants to have a chiselled body like Bipasha or Kareena, Leena Mogre comes as a saviour who is not just a fitness expert but armed with a Masters in Food Science & Nutrition. While fitness for Leena is waking and sleeping with a smile, she was in the city to promote Leena Mogre’s Fitness in Sector 8.

Having trained actors like Madhuri Dixit and Katrina Kaif, she’s lately been busy with Kangana Ranaut and says she is one of the actors who likes to experiment with her body. “Kangana has changed her body a lot. From a thin model in Fashion to a well-toned body in Kites she went for a fuller figure for her role in Once Upon a Time in Mumbai,” she says.

Are celebrities committed to fitness? “They are more than dedicated and follow their fitness regime quite religiously. They even workout after the tiring film shoots.”

Defining fitness for us, Leena says, “There is always a misconception that ‘thin is fit’. Thin is definitely not fit, but it’s the percentage of muscle and even fat that defines how fit a person is.”

With more than 20 years in the world of fitness, her training programme includes a fitness assessment chart where an individual is first tested on various grounds and then enrolled into a class. “One cannot straightaway ask a person to climb a treadmill and start exercising. For results a trainer needs to know the body type and then only can a fitness programme begin.” Her fitness centre works on the same grounds and assesses a person before chalking out a fitness programme for him/her.

An established name in the world of fitness, Leena has also been responsible for establishing Gold's Gym in India and Bangladesh. And now, with her own, Leena Mogre's specialised chain of gyms we ask what made her foray into Punjab? “Chandigarh is a city where people are waking up to the importance of being fit. Since there is awareness, I decided to launch here after Mumbai.”

Spelling five fitness mantras for us she says, “Make fitness a part of your life and you’ll never fall sick. Eat right food at right time. Don’t believe in fad diets. They are never helpful. Don’t go overboard with fitness. Do cross-training. No single exercise can help you get in shape rather it’ll get monotonous.” 

With special programmes like health & anti-ageing, goal specific, sports-specific training, and injury rehabs, Leena Mogre’s Fitness will also have special classes on functional training, kickboxing, power training, power yoga, spinning and flowin. She’s the only chain of specialised fitness gyms to introduce the flowin workout in India. Explaining the concept she says, “Its a functional exercise that targets at stability, mobility, strength, balance, speed, and power. The basic principle of flowin is based on vertically constricted movements over a larger plate, while friction is off-loaded by smaller pads sliding horizontally across the plate.”

Sure, that’s what keeps her skin glowing! “I live a very disciplined life (which is boring for a lot of people) where I workout daily. Sometimes I do 100 surya namaskars, weight training, kickboxing and last I follow a well-balanced diet. Believe me when I say, 70 per cent of a fit body is diet and 30 per cent is exercise. So one must make sure they eat healthy.” 

Dream come true
Nicole Faria always wanted to be an international star

The newly crowned Miss Earth Nicole Faria says she took up modelling to fulfil her dream of being an international superstar."I always wanted to be an actor, an international superstar. But my parents asked me to first finish my class X exams. At the age of 15, I started modelling in Bangalore and then moved to Delhi," Faria said.Nicole Faria was crowned as Miss Earth 2010 during the 10th Miss Earth Pageant held in Vietnam on December 4."For me modelling is the stepping stone for my entry into Bollywood. But this does not mean I will stop modelling.I have been receiving lot of offers from filmmakers but I am waiting for the right break," the 20-year-old model said.Faria, who is the first Indian girl to win the Miss Earth tiara, was very excited and happy to win the title. "I was filled with immense joy. I was shocked. All I wanted to do is to hug my parents and brother," she said.Following her win, Faria, who is busy endorsing the green cause, said, "We all must join our hands and work together to make our mother earth a greener and peaceful place. I want to promote Rain Water Harvesting, water conversation, planting trees, using cycle rickshaws and reducing pollution." Faria, who has been modelling professionally since five years, believes that it is the small simple steps that would save nature."Our planet has given too much to us and now it is our turn to do something worthwhile," she said. — PTI 

Sonakshi's maxim
Will never wear revealing clothes for popularity 

Actor Sonakshi Sinha has shot down reports that she posed in a bikini for the cover of Maxim magazine.

"Quite shocked to see India Today carrying an article on me appearing on Maxim in a bikini!! Yeah right," Sonakshi wrote on Twitter.

A photograph published on India Today's website shows Sonakshi wearing a white bikini but the magazine's cover shows her wearing a black dress.

"These guys generally have their facts and figures right! Got the fact that I'm on Maxim right, but the figure (pun intended) completely wrong! Would've been smart if they checked out the magazine before writing whatever they felt like. It's not about me anymore but about their credibility," she added.

Sonakshi, who made her Bollywood debut as a simple village girl with Salman Khan- starrer Dabangg, had set her record straight that she would never wear revealing clothes in her films to garner popularity.

The newcomer is set to change her on screen image with her next two films - Kick, where she will romance Salman again, and Akshay Kumar-starrer Joker. — IANS

Commercial gain
Akshay Kumar is not ready to leave mainstream cinema

Akshay Kumar loves playing the quintessential Bollywood hero and though he would like to experiment more with his roles, the actor is not ready to leave the sphere of commercial cinema.

The 43-year-old actor, who saw three of his films --Housefull, Khatta Meetha and Action Replayy releasing this year, had a mixed run at the box office. And as he gears up for his last release of the year, Farah Khan's masala flick Tees Maar Khan, Akshay says he will not compromise with the entertainment quotient of his films because that's what works with the masses. "I love to play different roles and I am not afraid to experiment or make movies that have different roles. But I have always known that only commercial cinema really works here. Oscar winning movies never tend to work in India. Well, no problem with that but it slightly curbs what aspiring actors want to do in their careers," Akshay said.

Akshay, who has been in the industry for a couple of decades now and has acted in close to 100 films, however, sometimes craves to go beyond the commercial boundaries. "Masala movies are awesome to do but sometimes one wants to break boundaries, create epics and perform challenging roles. But then India's masses are not really interested in those kind of films. "Life is stressful enough that they just want to be happily entertained and really, I can't blame them. Tees Maar Khan stands for the masses and pleasing them is all that I ever want to do."

The actor, however, feels that not all the ambitious movies work at the box office. "As an actor I feel people should realise that in this industry it is dangerous if you only do what the audience expects as it is inevitably dangerous to attempt anything new as well. Hence the reason not every ambitious movie works. One aims to please and show versatility but 90 per cent of the times it goes unwanted. Whoever said that 'show business' was easy?" Akshay has replaced Farah's perennial favourite, Shah Rukh Khan in Tees Maar Khan, which will also see him reuniting with Katrina Kaif after a long time.It is Farah's third film after the success of Main Hoon Naa and Om Shanti Om, and revolves around the exploits of a conman, played by Akshay. The racy number Sheila Ki Jawaani, featuring Kaif, has already topped the music charts and despite the number, the actor says that it is family comedy. "It is fast and full of humour. But then this is no brainless comedy and Sheila is sure to make you dance."

Also starring Akshaye Khanna, Tees Maar Khan is all set to see a Christmas release on December 24. — PTI

Munni phir badnaam hui

Bollywood item girl Malaika Arora Khan is set to shake a leg with southern stars Suriya and Junior NTR in a new commercial for Zandu Balm, an Emami product. The bosses at Emami were upset when their brand name was used in the hit song Munni badnam hui, which was picturised on Malaika, but later they buried the hatchet and roped in the actor as their brand ambassador. "It's like deja vu. I'm thrilled to be dancing to Zandu balm all over again, it brings back memories. It is a fun song and I am very pleased to be associated with the 100-year-old brand Zandu," Malaika said in a statement.

Tamil superstar Suriya and Telugu actor Junior NTR have also been roped in as the brand ambassadors and the trio will be seen dancing to the tune of Main Zandu Balm Hui, Darling Tere Liye in the ad.

Reincarnating the Munni Badnaam frenzy, the advertisement will hit television screens in last week of December in Tamil, Telugu and Hindi.

The Hindi version will be directed by Prahlad Kakkar. — IANS

Hurley's all praise for Arun 

A day after announcing her separation from Indian entrepreneur Arun Nayar on Twitter, British beauty Elizabeth Hurley took to the website again to shower praises on her ex, amid reports that the lack of a pre-nuptial agreement can make the split messy. 

The 45-year-old model-actor who made the announcement after photographs of her kissing Australian cricketer Shane Warne were published by the tabloid News of the World, called Nayar a "great father" to her son Damian."Painful, sad days. Arun and I separated for private reasons but FTR he has been a great father to our son Damian and will always be in his life (sic)," tweeted the actor. — PTI

BEER with us
Newly opened Hops n Grains, in Sector 9, Panchkula, promises to serve its own brand of beer
Manpriya Khurana

If not the place than at least the name makes it as clear as the beer they claim to serve. With Hops n Grains, in Sector 9, Panchkula, the city gets its first microbrewery. Tangent to the three-floors and two-bars venture are a restaurant, and a lounge replete with a resident DJ et al.

"We'll be serving four types, the Light Lager, Premium lager, Weiss and Dunkel. We'd be serving only our own beer and not any other brand. We even have a qualified brew master. He's the guy who launched Cobra and Budweiser. I'd say beer is our USP," having established that, Dr Priyanka Gupta, director, moves onto briefing the other details.

A few steps in the semi-cellar, industrial-complex-turned-into-restaurant feel to the place. There's a splash of wooden brown, apart from the iron in the interiors. Think leather padded inlets, glass stairs coupled with unfinished concrete surfaces. To give the distinct feel; all the three floors, the bar and the restaurant overlook the tanks and the brewery.

"We wanted to make it like a place we wanted to go to. Where there's some really good groovy music, and the entire ambience has life to it." She adds, "For anyone who's really interested and curious, we'll be more than happy to give a tour of the entire place." What perhaps strikes the most is the silvery steel beer lines running directly from the tanks up till the tanks of the bar. To please the connoisseurs of the spirit, there's a literature that runs just as cosmopolitan; "the barley is from Australia, hops are from Germany and the yeast is French."

The console of the DJ occupies the top-notch place, visible from almost every table of each floor. "We have a resident DJ Ronnie and yes, we'll be playing only house and rock, no commercial tracks or any other music sensibilities," she cuts in.

Over to the multi-cuisine restaurant - there will be, apart from the Indian and the other standard International fare, elaborate Italian options. For the 'spirited' lot, the menu runs just as exhaustive with interesting trivia about the beer and its origins. A fortnight before the New Year's Eve, there's yet another option to zero-in on. Chips in Priyanka, "For the Christmas eve, we'll be roping in DJ Humzaa with his team of three percussionists with one on the saxophone. And for 31st too, there'll be a New Year's party and the only time we'll be playing commercial tracks ever. Apart from that there will be beer festivals but that'll be rolled out later next year."

As of now, this one's out to hand over the bear hugs err…the beer mugs to one and all!

Owner's pride

Samsung India has launched a new range of Frost Free and Direct Cool refrigerators for the Indian market. The 29 models across four different capacities in the 'Inspira' Frost free and 'Pride' Direct Cool range, are all 5 Star rated. Both the 'Inspira 'and 'Pride' ranges represent the perfect blend of design, convenience and performance.

The entire Inspira Frost Free refrigerator range comes equipped with dual cooling sensor (DCS) technology that ensures independent temperature controls for the freezer and fridge compartments, while the 'Power Surround Cooling' ensures quicker and more even cooling of the stored food. Additionally the Inspira refrigerators have the innovative 'cool pack' feature in the freezer section that maintains the freezer temperature inspite of the power cuts, a Frrrunch vegetable box and a stylish surf handle. The stylish Pride Direct Cool refrigerator models come with a clean look, new recess handle, a bigger transparent vegetable box, deep door that provides space for bigger bottles and rust proof base. Both the Inspira and the Pride range are completely stabilizer free and energy efficient with a BEE 5Star rating. — TNS

Free spirit 
SD Sharma

Having retired from government service, city-based Rajinder Malhotra recollects how his first poem, published in an Urdu daily, made him famous overnight. Later, he took a deep interest in free verses, which caught the attention of some of the poetry connoisseurs.

Malhotra got his maiden book released at a function held under the aegis of Samvaad Sahitya Aur Patarkarita Manch in the city on Wednesday. Eminent litterateur and Doordarshan station director Dr KK Rattu was part of the release ceremony.

Rajinder has presented his poetry live on a Doordarshan programme and been interviewed by DD Jalandhar.

It was not easy for a science graduate to step into the legacy of his father Dr CL Malhotra, who had a command over Urdu poetry. But idolising him as also Sharat Chandra as well as novelist Nanak Singh he brought out this poetry book in Hindi titled " Niyati". 

Jazz(y) time 

Jazzy B, the 'crown prince of Bhangra', promises to jazz up Christmas and New Year celebrations for the city folks. A true global citizen, dressed in Brazil's soccer jersey, funky cap and huge 'khanda', this 'Rambo' loves to wear his love for his land on his sleeve.

"My village is still my favourite place on the earth, closely followed by Amritsar, for reverence for Harmandir Sahib," says the singer who is a globetrotter due to professional commitments.

This New Year, Jazzy B is going to be in city as part of Zanders Melange 2010 at Chandigarh Club. A weeklong extravaganza will also have entertainer comedian Sudesh Lehri, MTV DJ Chitrakshi and Sufi singers Wadali Brothers. The event will have kids' carnival and tambola as well. The New Year night is going to be Jazzy B special with live music. "It will be wholesome family entertainment. I assure you a rocking night," says the singer.

About his 2011 plans, "We will be out with a new album in April, a heady mix of folk and funky. And also on list is working for a drug-free world."

Brand bargain

JAFRA® Cosmetics International, Inc. ventures into India, through a strategic joint venture between the Ruchi Group and the parent company Vorwerk KG & Co. Commencing operations in New Delhi in October, JAFRA Ruchi Cosmetics India Pvt. Ltd. announced a new partnership with actress and model Sushmita Sen at a press conference in New Delhi.

Speaking on the association, Johan Wicklund, joint managing director, JAFRA Ruchi Cosmetics India says, "We are extremely delighted to bring JAFRA in India in partnership with the Ruchi Group. This association helps us reduce the learning curve considerably and gives us the right leverage to expand into every part of the country effectively."

He adds, "We are also honoured to have Sushmita Sen as the face of our brand. Sushmita represents the aspirations of Indian women today and her commitments towards the entrepreneurial spirit to make a difference for women around the world aligns perfectly with the JAFRA mission, vision, and values. We are extremely delighted to partner with Sushmita and hope for a long association."

Sushmita Sen, Brand Ambassador JAFRA Ruchi Cosmetics India says, "I strongly believe and work towards women empowerment and JAFRA's brand ideologies strongly speak the same. This is one strong reason I opted to endorse a brand like JAFRA. It is a brand, which not only offers a wide range of skincare products but also provides a great business opportunity to all its consultants. I truly look forward to the association." — TNS

2011 is round the corner and it’s time for New Year resolutions once again 

As we bid goodbye to 2010, it’s ceremonial to take stock of life, introspect and make plans for the coming year. A new research sheds light on what makes New Year resolutions work. Julia Bayuk’s study that recently got published in the Journal of Consumer Research says that if you know ‘why’ you want to achieve a particular goal, you are more likely to achieve it.

We bring to you few interesting resolutions and the reasons ‘why’ these folks are aiming for them.

Shachi Singh Bedi, a new mum, wants to lead a ‘more disciplined life’ in 2011. “Having a child is a life-changing experience. Now that my son is nine months old, it looks like I can get back into shape and work,” shares Shachi. A disciplined life would ensure that she gives time to her exercise, work and household chores. “I know I have my hands full, but I also know a bit of streamlining and I can do wonders on other fronts,” she smiles.

Gaganpreet, dance instructor at Spiritu-all, Sector 7, Panchkula, is all set to ‘be positive’. Just back after learning ‘line dancing’ from US, this girl knows ‘why’. “Everyone around is looking for happiness. I believe that ‘happiness’ is infectious. If I am happy, I will be able to spread joy. And the secret to being happy is being positive,” she shares. “Thoughts shape our destiny and it’s not very difficult to be positive,” shares Gaganpreet who is all set to teach line dancing in her classes in the coming year.

‘Striking a balance’ is what entrepreneur and musician Sahil Sarin wants to do. “I am dabbling in two different fields — music and business. And trust me, both work very differently,” says Sahil. This entrepreneur who runs a production company The Local Train is clear on what he wants from life. “I believe that it is balanced life that’s fulfilling. Torn between two worlds, sometimes I feel like Dr Jekylle and Mr Hyde, but I also know the significance of both in my life. So it’s going to be a fine balance between the two in 2011,” says Sahil.

For Manju Sharma, a Punjab Government employee, the New Year resolution is simple and sweet. “I am going to devote more time to my kids,” she shares. Being an employee, Manju goes through her share of workload, tensions and traffic. “I realise that soon my children would fly off my nest to pursue their careers. I need to make the most of whatever little time we are left with,” she says.

Have you thought of your New Year resolution yet?

Tip talk

l Set realistic goals

l Limit the number of resolutions

l Enlist family’s & friends’ support

l Reward yourself on achieving milestones

Relatively speaking
New beginnings

Every human has an inherent desire to assure others of his or her commitment levels. This idealistic portrayal of the self could be one of the reasons why people believe in such affirmations like the New Year resolution. A new year ushers in new beginnings, new alliances and new perspectives. It is like a harbinger of better times. The spirit associated with the New Year arouses the desire for newer commitments and affiliations. Work undone or incomplete, desires unfulfilled or promises not kept during the past year leave much to desire from the New Year. Resolutions, in the entirety of the atmosphere in which these are undertaken, evoke a sense of responsibility in that human being to commit himself/herself towards their logical culmination.

Suneet Kheterpal, Chandigarh


Each New Year's eve, we sit down to ponder over what we would like to change and what we want to achieve and thus, after much thought, frame our New Year resolutions! These resolutions we promise to stick to for the rest of the year. Regardless of whether we actually stick to them or not, these resolutions sure make us aware of the fact that somewhere within us, is a desire to eliminate all weakness of ours. They help us decide our goals and, if followed diligently, lead to achievement and satisfaction. New year resolutions are made to be broken, they say. However, there is more to these resolutions than that. They are tools of introspection that can help us overcome our shortcomings. A firm resolution is the best way to start a new year. 

Harnoor Suri, Chandigarh

A mere fad

A New Year resolution' is just a myth and as seen and heard, serves no valuable purpose. It has become a mark of fashion to make a New Year resolution. But as people step into the New Year, they forget their resolutions and are back to where they were. Actually speaking, people who are serious about changing something in their life for their betterment or for the happiness of their loved ones, do not need the New Year round the corner to make a resolution. If they are serious, they can do it anytime and any day of the year as everyday and every time is good for a good cause.

Niti A Chandra, Chandigarh

Violence in video games

A new study says no connection between both A new research has suggested that violence in video games or on television is not related to serious acts of youth aggression. In fact, how depressed young people are strongly predicts how aggressive and violent they may be or may become, says Dr. Christopher Ferguson from Texas A and M International University who carried out the research.

Ferguson recruited 302 mainly Hispanic youth between the ages of 10 and 14 years, from a small Hispanic-majority city population on the border of Mexico, as part of a larger study of youth violence. They were interviewed twice - once at the start of the study and again 12 months later. Ferguson looked at their exposure to violence both in video games and on television as well as negative life events, including neighbourhood problems, negative relationships with adults, antisocial personality, family attachment, and delinquent peers.

He also assessed the styles of family interaction and communication, adolescents' exposure to domestic violence, depressive symptoms, serious aggression, bullying and delinquent behaviour.

Ferguson found that depressive symptoms were a strong predictor for youth aggression and rule breaking, and their influence was particularly severe for those who had pre-existing antisocial personality traits.

However, neither exposure to violence from video games or television at the start of the study predicted aggressive behaviour in young people or rule-breaking at 12 months.

Ferguson concluded: "Depressive symptoms stand out as particularly strong predictors of youth violence and aggression, and therefore current levels of depression may be a key variable of interest in the prevention of serious aggression in youth.

"The current study finds no evidence to support a long-term relationship between video game violence use and subsequent aggression. Even though the debate over violent video games and youth violence will continue, it must do so with restraint." — ANI

Unusual swayamvar

Cellcast Interactive India has launched India’s first interactive matrimony show on matrimony on television, called Jab We Talk. The show, that’s aired on Imagine Showbiz is in collaboration with online matrimonial site, is all set to bring a fresh face to the conventional matrimony show by making them completely interactive.

Pankaj Thakar, CEO, Cellcast Interactive, says, “Traditionally, matchmaking is usually restricted to personal introductions, community marriage bureaus, the Internet and newspapers’ classifieds where profiles are advertised and there is hardly any communication between the people who are actually going to marry! With our unique Jab We Talk show, viewers can actually communicate with their prospective partners without having to risk their privacy”. Being a participative show, viewers are encouraged to establish contact with the profiled people. — TNS

Renee Writes
at or Life Style, The Tribune, Sector 29-C, Chd
Flow with life

I am 42-year-old and extremely bored in my marriage. First me and my husband were good friends, but slowly as the children grew up, our relationship started falling apart and now it seems to be next to nothing. In fact, now that the boys are growing up I have a lot more time for myself. I had convinced myself that my marriage was a good one. Actually, I do not remember having anything in common with my husband. Now that our kids have moved away from home, I feel more and more alienated from my husband. I am wondering if we should be living together at all. Please suggest. 

Alka Nijhawan, Kurukshetra 

It is all very well to say I am bored but I am just wondering how justified is one to make a judgment like that. You must realise that there are no perfect relationships. We have to make compromises here and there. Marriage is not only about feeling great and high on happiness constantly. One has to flow easy through life and if we have a nice companion with us on our journey, it is a luxury. Yet we cannot just leave people because they do not fit into our way of thinking or they are different from us. It is great to have children who are the common bond between parents but it definitely does not mean that once they move away, the bond should fall apart. I would recommend that you try and create some excitement in your relationship by doing some fun things together.

Weekend woes

I am 27, married to a 32-year-old man. My husband  is a weekend husband. I live in Chandigarh and he lives in Delhi. I work in a college here while he is with a multinational company. He comes over every Friday and goes back on Sundays. We have been doing this for the past two years and it seemed a fair arrangement. It suited us both financially and emotionally. Recently, there are some changes in his behavior. He is not very keen to come over on the weekends. He is making a lot of excuses. Do you think he is having an affair? I am disturbed. Please help.

Risham  Gularia, Chandigarh 

Enjoy your life and do not stress. Yes, a weekend husband sometimes can be a lot of fun if things are running smoothly. In today’s world, where job takes up a lot of time and the weekends are the only time we spend together with our spouse. Quality time spent together can be much more interesting from just being together. As for the new situation, which seems to be bothering you, there could be two reasons. One that your husband is perhaps tired of the routine of running up and down the same route every weekend and just needs a change from the routine. There are so many reasons one can think of, but I feel that we must always be positive and not doubt the partner. Why don’t you change your pattern and maybe start visiting Delhi on alternate weekends. This will give him some breathing space. All relationships need a constant recharge and refueling. So try and keep the spark alive by introducing new and interesting aspects to your existing life. Even a little heart-to-heart talk will do you good. Subtly you can ask him about the changes in his behavior. Don’t worry, things will definitely change for the better once you work towards it.

Such a headache

I am a 34, married for three years and have a two-year-old son. I am very fond of my wife. My problem is that she seems to be always irritated and ready to fight. I am stressed about her behaviour. My parents who also live with us get stressed too. The atmosphere in our house is constantly tens e and I just hate going back home, as I know I will be confronted with all sorts of nasty and sarcastic remarks. Even my little son gets affected and starts crying. Please tell me how to sort out this situation. I am getting headaches constantly. 

Ramesh Kathiura, Nangal 

Take charge of your life. Once you are in control, everything around you naturally falls into place. First, you should have a heart-to-heart chat with your wife. Try to analyse what is bothering her. People only get irritable when they cannot express themselves and feel that they are not understood. Once she knows that she is being accepted by you and your family, a lot of her animosity will settle down. Make her feel loved to give her emotional comfort. Do not allow your little son to witness any verbal abuse for it is not healthy for him. And I think you should take control and sort things. Headaches are due to tension. Once you are at ease they will get cured. Meditate to be at peace.

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