No beating about boundaries

Gurnaaz Kaur

Twenty years back, a famous cricketer met a beautiful woman. It was a start of friendship that blossomed into love. Anyone who knows cricket knows Ajit Agarkar, former international cricketer, commentator and golf player. His wife Fatima Agarkar is an educationist. Here’s their story of togetherness.

The beginning of forever

Ajit: We both met in East Africa through common friends when I was part of the CCI team and we caught up during the 1999 World Cup.

Fatima: We were introduced by Rohan Gavaskar in 1997/98 and then we met again in 1999 during the World Cup. We kept in touch and slowly the friendship grew into something more.

Time for commitment

Ajit: In 2001, post the Australian tour, we both knew that we wanted to commit to a long-term relationship and told our respective families…By Feb 9th 2002, after the India-England series in India, we tied the knot.

Fatima: Once Ajit came back from Australia in 2001, we both knew that we have to tell our parents as well, given we were from different religious beliefs… and honestly, he was a public figure so people would notice and ask questions. He asked me and I said yes…!

The best part began

Ajit: Being married to someone who was a friend made me feel complete and the best part for us was becoming parents. So, for the 18 years of being together, we have enjoyed raising our son Raj who will be 15 in October.

Fatima: Life has changed after marriage. We have two different cultural backgrounds, grew up with different experiences and I think we are both richer for it! He’s eating more non-veg Bori food for sure, and I prefer more veg food!

Living together means

Ajit: I feel I have my best friend with me all the time.

Fatima: Living together is easy with Ajit. He is very organised, particular about things and honestly, till you asked this question, never really thought about it. I suppose – seamless is the word that comes to mind as we lived on our own from day one and built our home together.

We time

Both: We love to travel, explore new places, read, and watch movies. We watch a lot of sports together as well.

If I could change

Ajit: I wish she would worry less!

Fatima: I want him to laugh a bit more…!

When it gets annoying

Ajit: Well, I wish she would eat a bit more, and not constantly run around doing things … but that’s just her – loves organizing.

Whenever there is time

Ajit: She loves her sleep and especially on a Sunday. We love watching movies and also catching up with our friends.

Fatima: Because we both travel a lot, and have work commitments, our free time is usually spent watching movies or hanging with friends.

Couple goals

Ajit: We don’t really have ‘goals’ as a couple, and generally take it as it comes. We do know that we are responsible for our son and families and work towards being a part of each other’s traditions and customs given our growing up days and cultures were different.

Fatima: No goals as such. Just want to make sure we balance our time, being there for each other’s family, build something for Raj and basic stuff that most couples have.

Makes me go wow

Ajit: She’s super passionate about her work and I love that energy about her.

Fatima: I have always admired his determination and work ethics as a sportsman and the ability to be a risk taker.

For a happy married life

Ajit: Marriage is about being open-minded, patient and appreciating each other’s strengths.

Fatima: Being able to embrace every moment and not judging.

Space matters

Ajit: It is essential for a relationship to give the right amount of space and respect.

Fatima: Personal space is important, because it gives you a sense of freedom and yet in a healthy manner.