Parted ways with family, yet leading a ‘blissful’ life

Nikhil Bhardwaj

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Tribune News Service

Ludhiana, October 1

Parted ways with family years ago, but they have no regrets and are leading a happy life at Shri Vivekananda Swarg Ashram Trust, a home for senior citizens in the city.

Leaving all worries behind, these senior citizens have created a world of their own at the ashram.

Some were abandoned by their wards, while some parted ways on their own as they did not want to be a burden on their children.

The fact that their children are running away from joint family system disturbs most of them. Ludhiana Tribune interacted with a few elderly people to get an insight into their life and the situation that brought them to the elderly home. At present, 35 elderly women and 27 men are staying at the ashram which is operational since 1994.

Jagpal Kaur, an 80-year old woman, was a native of Delhi and is here with her daughter for the past six years.

On being asked how she landed at the ashram, teary-eyed Kaur said: “Na hi pucho, purane zindgi de jakham jaag jande ne (better you don’t ask as old wounds return to haunt). My wards have everything, are economically sound too, but they claim they don’t have a space where they can keep me and my daughter.”

“But now, I have no grudge from life. Both of us live happily at the ashram. I don’t have anything against my family who refused to take our load,” Kaur said. Surinder Kaur (85), here for last three years, recalls her time when she came with her husband, who later died due to cancer. “Since I have only one daughter, I didn’t want to put any burden on her, so we started living here,” she said.

Another woman Suhag Rani from Jalandhar recalled that she was forced to leave the house by her daughter-in-law. “My daughter-in-law had categorically told my son that if I stayed on, she won’t live in the same house, due to which I had to leave the house,” she said.

Many elderly women said children want to live separately from parents these days. “My son has a government job and is earning well, but still he turned against me and asked me to go to the old-age home, obviously at the behest of his wife,” an elderly woman said.

In 106th year of his life, Sunder Singh fending for himself

Sunder Singh (105), a native of Ramuwal village near Shahkot in Jalandhar district, who claims to be a retired Punjab Government employee, said his children, despite serving in top Punjab Government posts, dumped him in the ashram. Sunder, who is here at the ashram for past six years, said he owned a huge chunk of agricultural land, but that, too, was taken away from him. “When my wife died, neither of my children turned up at the cremation. What else can I expect from them now? I will always have this grudge in the remaining days of my life,” he said.

Veteran actor walks alone

Veteran actor Satish Kaul (62), who was once the heartthrob of Punjabi cinema in the 1980s, is leading a terrible life. Facing several health issues, Kaul shifted to Shri Vivekananda Swarg Ashram in Ludhiana in September this year only. Once an owner of a palatial house and property worth crores, Kaul is now struggling for his daily bread. He said though he contributed tremendously for Punjabi cinema, nobody even cared to know about his wellbeing. “Neither people in Punjabi cinema, nor the Punjab Government cares,” Kaul alleged. 

Notably, Satish Kaul won the ‘lifetime achievement’ award for his contribution to Punjabi cinema in 2011. He is regarded as one of the most successful regional film actors of all times. He started an acting school in Ludhiana, which lost money. His notable roles include those in Sassi Punnu, Ishq Nimana, Suhag Chooda and Patola. 

Satisfied with facilities at ashram

Though every elderly at Shri Vivekananda Swarg Ashram Trust has his/her own tale of woes, they say they are satisfied over the facilities being provided by the trust. 

“We are being given enough food, fruits, juice and other eatables. Sometimes we have to request them not to provide so many eatables. The homely atmosphere is more than what we had while living with our wards,” another woman said. “Tell my ward, I am leading a happy life here. I don’t need them now. My blessings are with them,” a 70-year-old woman said.

Na hi pucho, purane zindgi de jakham jaag jande ne (better you don't ask our story, old wounds return to haunt). My children have everything, are economically sound too, but they claim they don't have a space where they can keep me and my daughter. But now, I have no grudge from life. Both of us live happily at the ashram. I don't have anything against my family who refused to take our load. — Jagpal Kaur, staying here with her daughter for the past six years

My daughter-in-law had categorically told my son that if I stayed on, she won't live in the same house, due to which I had to leave the house. — Suhag Rani, from Jalandhar 

Since I have only one daughter, I didn't want to put any burden on her, so we started living here. — Surinder Kaur, staying here for last three years