When life is a glorious gallimaufry
Harvinder Khetal
This past week has been a jaw-dropping perception of the pictures, predominantly packed with the Ps: 'Parched', 'Pink', Pierce Brosnan (paan masala). The Ps made an interesting gallimaufry of movies, feminism, actors and ethics. A gallimaufry is a confused mixture or medley. But let me confess that with the last P, I am having a hard time minding my p's and q's (to be polite, behave well and mind one's manners).
On Friday morning, my bleary eyes popped wide open with Pierce Brosnan piercing into my peaceful reverie as he peeped out from the front page ad in a paper, pitching for Pan Bahar. Oh, no! The Hollywood actor, my favourite James Bond shown as the suave spy wielding a gun to kill goons, gave the impression of an over-the-hill roadside gunda selling a can of paan, desperately trying to be debonair. His dashing Bond image took a further dip when I imagined him spouting a red liquid pichkaari from his mouth like all paan-chewing people perpetually do, as he went about drawing red blood from the enemy. The tag line "Class never goes out of style" failed to lift the bearded star donning a tuxedo from the don-like morass (a tag line is a catchphrase or slogan, especially as used in advertising, or the punchline of a joke). How could it? Class and style are totally incongruous with the addictive and carcinogenic concoctions of betel and areca nuts, tobacco, lime, clove and other spices. Just as the red paan stain stubbornly stays, the stain on style also seems to stick. Going by the trolls, the twitterati tends to think so too. The product makers, of course, claim that it's only a mouth-freshener.
The reports of the star model having gotten over a crore of rupees for the advertisement campaign again bring into focus the question of the responsibility of celebrities in endorsing brands. Remember how last year Amitabh Bachchan, Madhuri Dixit and Preity Zinta had faced flak for being ambassadors for Maggi? Or, those commercials that mislead you into believing that you could become fairer or wrinkle-free? Following public outrage, the Consumer Protection Act was amended to make celebrities accountable for the products they endorse. Perhaps, it's that fear that kept our local celebrities far from the lure of the moolah? Anyway, I doubt if very many red-lipped paan fans are pink-lipped Brosnan fans.
That brings us to the second P of the gallimaufry: 'Pink'. 'Pink' was a riveting presentation of the pain of three young urban independent girls oppressed by educated boys who refuse to take a 'no' from a girl and how they overcome the ordeal. With emphasis on consent, it could well be a manual for men on how to mind their p's and q's in relation to women. The third P, 'Parched', also a tale of three gutsy women, in contrast talks about the travails of middle-aged rural rustic females ravaged by insensitive illiterate chauvinists. I guess these males need a bigger lesson in minding their p's and q's.
By the way, pink reminds me of my little niece whose idea of beauty is firmly associated with the colour pink. Shopping for her always means buying a Barbie doll in a pink dress. Once, she selected the doll with a car, but threw a tantrum about her gown that was in a purple shade. Only when I bought a pink gown separately did she calm down. And, no points for guessing that the first thing she did when we unwrapped the box was to change her dress.
But, the gallimaufry of words with pink, the pink slip is surely the most dreaded. It is the notice that employment is ending. However, in my Spanish class, I would always be tickled pink (be happy) whenever the word rosa came up. Unlike some other words, I never had difficulty in learning that rosa means the colour pink. Like a pink rose. My Spanish professor's name was Rosa, too.
Incidentally, the word gallimaufry comes from the 16th century French galimafree, which was a meat stew consisting of a variety of dishes. In English, it evolved into gallimaufry, standing for any mix or jumble of things. As Shakespeare says in 'Merry Wives of Windsor': "He woos both high and low, both rich and poor ... he loves the gallimaufry." Or, simply: life is a gallimaufry.
— hkhetal@gmail.com
