Take the road less travelled

Sarika Kanwar

Human beings are social animals is what we are taught right in the initial years of school. We tend to live and thrive in groups, be it family or our friends. However, we don’t get to pick our families, but with friends, we always have a choice. As another saying goes, we are known by the company we keep. Our friends structure our personality in several ways.

How do we choose our friends? Do we analyse ourselves first and then start looking for people with similar mindset? Or we make friends in bulk and then start filtering out the ones we want to stick to? I have always wondered if there are any set of rules that can help us pick the people we want to mingle with. If we are known by the company we keep, we’d rather want to have a good one.

But how ‘good’ are these ‘good’ people? Now that’s another dilemma I have always struggled with. What I feel is good enough for me, sometimes turns out not so good. Making friends is, most of the times, an influenced action, I think — influenced by our own expectations, needs, wants and fancies of life.

I may want to be friends with an extrovert, if I am an introvert. I may just like the fact that the person is friendly, famous and liked by others. I may befriend someone who has qualities or possessions that I don’t, just to fulfil my own aspirations. Or vice-versa could happen. Someone else may manipulate me into their friend zone for any ulterior motive.

In situations like these, the true meaning of being friends is clouded. And it does more harm to us than benefit. In the generation that is motivated by glitter and glam, most of our friends seem to impact our lives in a way that we sometimes lose our ownselves and mould into an alter ego of someone else. The insecurity of being left out or FOMO (fear of missing out) is so high that more often than not, we cross over from being ‘me’ to ‘them’. And before we even know it, we are no more our own self.

The good news, however, lies in the fact that with a little wisdom and patience, we can hold on to everything that we are. To embrace our strengths and flaws equally is a part of the process. Trying to lean on or hide behind someone else’s personality is never a solution.

Of course, it’s easier said than done. It is a difficult path to tread on — an uphill climb that can test our abilities to the core, so much so that we may want to give up. But the view from the top is worth it. When you stand tall for yourself, they all look up to you in awe and respect.

So, hold on to your virtues and take the road less travelled. Be your own prototype.

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