Let’s FaceTime for the time being

IT was Dolly didi’s 40th wedding anniversary. She was visiting her sister in Mumbai. The sister decided to call all their local cousins, elders, nephews and nieces over dinner to celebrate the occasion. But it was a celebration with a difference. Because didi’s husband had passed on three years ago!

Her sister was of the view that didi had had 37 wonderful years with her husband, who had earned name, fame, wealth and respect. The memories were beautiful… so there was every reason to celebrate. The sister called to invite their cousins, saying, “All of you come at 8:30; we can have dinner and also have the children on FaceTime so that they too can be part of the celebration.”

One of the cousins told her octogenarian mother, “Mama, chhoti didi called to invite us for dinner tonight to celebrate Dolly didi’s 40th wedding anniversary.” The old woman looked at her daughter incredulously, “Have they gone mad? Dolly’s husband passed on three years ago. What is an anniversary celebration without the husband?” “Come on, mama. Didi lived a good life while jijaji was there. Why should she not celebrate her memories? Why not remember the good times and be thankful for them? Come on, wear a nice sari and let’s go.”

The woman looked at her daughter straight in the eye, held her hand tightly and said firmly, “Agar aisa ho sakta hai to tumne mera kyun nahin karvaya apne papa ke saath?”

“Sorry, mama. Next time aapki bhi anniversary celebrate karenge. Pakka. Now please get ready naa.”

“Main kya poochh rahi hoon? Agar aisa ho sakta hai to mera kyon nahin kabhi FaceTime karvaya apne papa ke saath?”

“FaceTime with papa in heaven? Oh maa!!!”

When our cousin narrated this to us over dinner, we could not stop laughing. As I looked at Dolly didi, I tried to read her thoughts. There was perhaps so much to say that was left unsaid; so much to do that was left undone. Life is not easy without a partner, but she was facing everything with grace.

As I reminisce over this I feel that for those who have passed on leaving behind their soulmates, what other way is there for the one left behind other than to face time? There are good times and bad times; there are not so good times and not so bad times but time is eternal and has to be faced. So the only way forward is to face time!

Wistfully, I look up at the heavens and wish that there was a way to reach out to those who have left us, just to tell them how much we miss them and treasure the memories with them. All of us have someone or the other there, be it a parent or a spouse, a grandparent or an uncle, a friend or a sibling. Sadly, some even have children on the other side. The eternal truth is that all of us have to cross over to the other side… we just have to bide our time. Till then, let’s FaceTime!