The shoe fits, and loving it

RK Saboo

In our home gym, by oversight, I put my feet in my son’s sneakers and they fitted well. I was surprised because normally, his size is bigger. I felt elated getting into my son’s shoes just as I have always enjoyed wearing my father’s favourite pair of shoes. Yes, I have preserved it well and even after 30 years, am still using them.

Shoes may be symbolic. Cultures, traditions and habits run between generations in families. The flow is not only from the older to the younger, it is both ways. My mother was illiterate and used a thumb impression where required. I was in my teens and taught her English and Hindi alphabet. She was able to sign her documents. I learnt the art of letter writing from my father and both my sons taught me how to be precise and concise in my writings.

My wife Usha developed a knowledge of Indian classical music from her grandfather and father, and passed it on to my elder son, and then from him to his daughter. Gardening and flower arrangements flowed from her to our younger son and he developed it as an art form.

In my early years, I was engrossed in photography when I got my first box camera as a birthday gift. I upgraded with my father’s folding camera patching the bellows and moved upwards with Rolleiflex and Leica. Both my sons took it to digital heights. I am currently learning the art of calligraphy from my elder son.

My mother was a great force in our family bonding. Studies show that joint and nuclear families both have these traits in varying degrees in different parts of the world and cultures. Values are formed and traditions shared through family gatherings and events.

I recall attending the high school convocation of my granddaughter in Washington DC. Not only parents but also grandparents of students came. At that convocation, I got in conversation with a grandfather, and he said, ‘America will remain strong only as long as the ties that bind our generations together remain strong.’

Staying fit and healthy is another trait that runs through generations. Our family is a health freak which started with my father who went for a walk religiously. Usha and I have always tried to keep fit. Our elder son runs half marathons and both he and his wife jog and practise yoga. Recently, our younger son shed 25 kg by rigorous exercise. His wife is equally an avid walker. Our grandchildren are following the family tradition.

Amitabh Bachchan once said, ‘I feel like I am a friend with my children. There is an old saying… when the son wears his father’s shoes, they become friends.’

Sonali Bendre, on the other hand, stepped into her son Ranveer's shoes and loved them so much she refused to return them. It makes me recall Craig Morgan’s famous song, ‘Stumbling falling, trying to stand tall in, walking in my father’s shoes’.

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