Whither gone the charm of weddings!

Those were the days when weddings would exhibit a natural charm and glamour during celebrations. Now, they have acquired a tint of artificiality — a mere pomp and show, and hypocrisy. In the past, weddings were simple and sacred. These days, we often see deceit.

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Even the songs sung at the wedding of a daughter used to be such that they would touch one’s emotions. Today, there are mostly disco dances and DJ bands. The old-timers would recall wedding songs on recorded discs — Doli chahdhiaan maariaan heer cheeekan, menu lei chalay Baabla lei challey (Heer started crying bitterly, telling her father that she was taken away from her parents to the family of her in-laws). Things have changed now. Brides rarely shed tears while leaving for their in-laws’ house.

The bride going to be married was generally addressed as ‘Radha’ in the songs. Before the pheras, a song was sung: Doli de andar tenun kaahn bulaye, doli de andar kyon nahin aundee ne rang ratdiyee Radha (O bride in red attire, your Krishna-like groom is calling you under the canopy, why do you delay in joining him there?). Where does one hear such songs now?

The most emotional song that used to be often played was the one sung by Bibi Surinder Kaur. It was played at the time of the departure of the doli — Mavaan dhiaan miln lagiaan, chaare kandhaan nee chubare diaan hiliaan (When mother hugs her daughter at the time of the latter’s departure, all four walls of the room move under the emotional sway). Such a painful parting scene not only moved the bride’s mother and other women, but also the father and other relatives would start shedding tears. At this time the women would also sing: ‘Saare pind de banere roye, Baable ne tori laadli’ (Even the small protection walls on the terrace of all houses shed rain-like tears when a daughter leaves her father’s house).

But there was no dearth of songs with a different tilt, too! One such was about the bhabis of the bride — Nand dee doli tor ke, jhatt bhabiaan ne payee ludee (The sisters-in-law of the bride would dance in utter joy after their husband’s sister finally leaves their house)!

There is no doubt that these songs were only to sing along and added a kind of lustre and joy to the ceremonies. But at the same time, it can’t be denied that they represented the socio-cultural touch rooted in families.