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Why not adopt the elderly?

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The other day I rushed to the medical library to collect some citations. I gratefully appreciated the librarian who assisted me in the task and requested her to help me in the future also. ‘I shall help you,’ she said willingly, ‘but now onwards from my home, as I am taking VRS, though I have 10 more years of service!’ ‘Why so?’ I asked surprised. She mentioned that her husband was in Africa, and she had to look after her parents-in-law. ‘They are above 80 years and are unable to look after themselves. I need to be with them the whole day.’ I was flabbergasted. What with so many young couples discarding their old parents for their own personal comforts, here was a woman, in her midlife, sacrificing her own comforts and financial independence to look after her aged acquired relations! I bowed silently and said encouragingly, ‘I am really very proud of you!’

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When we were small we were taught that old is gold, indicating the practical and aesthetic value of things which are priceless like gold. In the present times, with so many exchange offers, young and middle age family members are tempted to replace their fridge, gadgets and what not. Similarly, they try to do away with old family members, without realising that they were brought up by them, bearing up with all trials and tribulations.

Recently I heard a son telling his parents, ‘I am very busy. I can give you everything, but not my time.’ I thought to myself, what could he possibly give to his parents, who might have sacrificed everything for him while raising him, if he could not even spare a little time for them? What do aged parents need? They need some company, some good words, running of some simple errands, safety reassurance, and at times, taking care of their minor health problems. Keeping in touch by phone, by email or in person may just take very little time and help old people to know that someone is out there for them when they need support!

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But generally, the elderly people are either left at old-age homes by their own children, or they themselves desire to settle down there due to lack of love and care in their own houses. Actually there is no need for old-age homes if children who think they lack time can hire personal caretakers for their parents. No one dies of old age — old people die from accidents and diseases, which can be thwarted for some time when given love by children.

Young couples, who fail to have biological children, take recourse to adoption and spend their time, energy and wealth in raising children. An outsider becomes the loved member of their family. Why can such couples, who are themselves very lonely in their lives, not adopt an old person and make him or her feel loved as a member of the family?

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